A year ago I went to the SHARE conference in St. Louis, MO and it was amazing. I presented a workshop on Family Traditions: Making Memories that Include Your Baby. One part we talked about holidays and how to get through difficult holidays.
One of the HARDEST holidays I think is Thanksgiving. For my family it usually involves a big family dinner, lots of little kid cousins running around, new babies being passed along for everyone to hold, and the most obvious empty spot in my heart and hands as my baby is not here. And the fact that it is darn hard to be THANKFUL about it. Even though it has been 6 years, it is still a reminder as I see the cousins born the same year as Gabriel and I watch them getting bigger and think of what he should be doing right now.
One idea given at that workshop by someone attending is: while everyone is sitting around the table for Thanksgiving dinner, have a toast to remember all family members who are absent from the table. I absolutely LOVE this! It is always a challenge to come up with ways to remember our babies, and often our attempts are awkwardly received by family members. Well, here is one that has individual meaning to each of us, and can easily be done without having to feel sad or awkward around your grouchy uncle or grandpa who may not want to deal with, or be reminded about a baby. Love this idea!
If you have ways you remember your children on Thanksgiving, I'd love to hear them- feel free to leave a comment and let us know what you do.
I'm wishing you all a gentle day and holiday season. peace- emily
Friday, November 21, 2008
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