Tuesday, December 30, 2008


Laura (Sophie's mom) emailed me this comment:

I was sitting here, reading a book. and I thought, I wonder if Emily has posted about writing? I have a journal I keep next to my bed. It is a small thing, given to me by a friend who lost her father far to early in his life. she gave it to me at Sophie's celebration of life service. She gave it to me with a note saying I should write my feelings. I can't really do that. I feel strange when I do that, for some reason. So instead I write letters to my daughter. I wrote every day after she left us. Now I try to write once a week. I work hard to not feel guilty when life pulls me away and I can't write. I write in my head and will put the thoughts to paper when I can find time to stop. My letters to Sophie will never be read by Sophie. I know that. But, in some strange way, I feel like i can read them to her in my heart.

I think she is so right- it can be very helpful. For me, I had been replaying Gabriel's birth over and over in my mind because I was worried when the details started fading- it felt like I was losing him again. I found it helped to write it all down in a safe place and get it all there- then I didn't have to keep it in the front of my mind all the time. I love how she has put it- that she "can read them to her in (her) heart."

I also think this can be a way to scrapbook for those of us with few photos- you can do a scrapbook page with an envelope and your letter tucked inside so it is more private.

Thanks for sharing this idea with us, Laura!


E and K Rausch said...

My journal was given to me by a friend who lost her son Issac 3 years ago. She said it helped her a lot. I have been using it. Not everyday every couple of day. Or when I am having a bad day. I feel that writing about how I feel on a bad day makes me feel a whole lot better. I also use my blog as a journal. I put the good and bad days on my blog, so people will know that you can have many good days in a row and then you can have a bad day in the middle of some good days. My hope is to help someone in there healing process. I know that reading many other peoples blogs who have lost children has helped me so much!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

This site is so beautiful. I can't wait to share it on my own site!

Aaron'sMommy said...

I journal a lot. For almost the first 2 years my husband and I continued our blog and I wrote weekly letters to Aaron. I wrote daily little notes in my paper journal. I still continue to journal, though it doesn't focus solely on Aaron. If I get away from my journaling I notice it.